Character+Sketch

Justin S. Sept.26/10 Character Sketch Paragraph


 * You **know him as Dave Conroy, some say he's "too brave", and others say he is unwise and few know him as only a very strong man. He traveled through the toughest of times in the toughest of places just to get the job done (too informal) and that job being delivering his trapped animals for money. Throughout the story you probably noticed that Dave is one of the strongest men you have ever read about. He kept on moving despite his body being on the breach of just falling down and dieing. On top of being so weak and tired, when he fell into the water he did not give up, proving the extent of his strength. Another way of describing Dave is he is very unwise. The numerous decisions made before death could have been entirely avoided by just slowing down Dave's life and ultimately escaping death but unfortunately he made those wrong decisions. Now his last trait was probably recognized by all who read the story, Dave is just too brave, he insisted on striving on further and further just to reach his dream oasis that we all gratefully call our home. His bravery stuck out the most when in the story he fell into the freezing water which metaphorically kicked him while he was down (too informal) and then on top of all that has happened to him he took on the uphill home stretch knowing how unforgiving that mountain is. Now if you do not know know what bravery is now, then what is?

Your ideas are sound; however, this was to be a formal paragraph. Please review the criteria. 4.5/6

Excellent paragraph Justin! Your descriptions are very detailed and well done You get 6/6


 * Paragraph**

1. Intro 2. 2nd most important trait 3. 3rd most important trait 4. 1st most important trait 5. Conclusion


 * Intro**

- statement of 3 traits and a general statement about how they influenced the outcome of the story


 * Traits**

- How is the trait relevant to the events in the story? use quotes or examples to back up your statements


 * Conclusion**

- Summarize characters dilemma and how traits impact the outcome - No new traits


 * Formal Writing**

Start your paragraph with a good topic sentence. Avoid “I think” statements. Use positive, confident statements. Avoid the use of contractions Avoid cliches Do not refer or draw attention to yourself in any way. Do not use "I" or "You" Do use "One" Use proper quote format.